Duh, right? I knew it would be. I told everyone, including myself, that that I was prepared to handle it. Per usual, this was much easier said than done.
It’s hard not knowing where you’ll end up in a month. It’s especially hard for me, a self-proclaimed control freak, avid planner, and strong MBTI “J,” to deal with such a large unknown. I think about it every morning when I wake up, periodically throughout the day, and again before I go to sleep at night. I’m having dreams about applying to jobs. It’s probably not an over-exaggeration to say that the job search has taken control of my life.
That probably sounds crazy, and it probably is in some ways, but I think many grads out there are feeling the same way. This process is tough. Most applications I’ve submitted thus far have included an online application that requires you to fill out 5+ pages of information with boxes that do not allow for quick copy & paste, most tediously your entire work history (May we contact this employer? Crap – yes? It looks bad to say no, right? Does she even work there anymore?). In addition to your cover letter, resume, and references, of course.
I heard from a fellow grad today that the average person submits 27 applications. I have no idea where that number came from, or who the “average person” is – SA grads? Job searchers in general? – but regardless, that’s a lot of applications! Most don’t seem to even give you the “thanks for your interest, but no thanks” response. As much as it sucks to hear you didn’t get a job, or even an interview, I’d rather know where I stand than be in limbo.
Thank goodness for my fantastic friends and family who have been nothing but supportive and uplifting. Someone close to me reminded me that I’m lucky: I have a back-up plan. My mom and step-dad have offered to move me to their house after graduation (actually, more like insisted), where they will feed me, support me, and supply internet for me to continue my search if need be. While this isn’t ideal, and I would much prefer to support myself, I have options. I have a support network. I have a place to live. It may not be ideal, but it’s so much more than so many others have. For now, I have to be okay with that. I have to remain positive and thankful for the things I do have. That, and I have to remain persistent and actively search and apply for jobs. Something good will come from this.